lonely

It’s strange to have Clayton and Porter both gone for awhile during the day. Clayton goes to school Monday-Friday from 8:25am-3:00pm and Porter goes to preschool Monday-Thursday from 11:30am-3:20pm. So I have four hours, four days a week with no kids (until the baby comes in January). That means 4 days a week I eat lunch all by myself. It is weird to be all alone. I cried after Porter went to preschool for the first day. I have had a kid home for six years now. Time flies by too quickly and I need to appreciate my boys more because they are growing up so fast! It will be fun, busy & challenging to have a new baby, but maybe I won’t be so lonely.

I think I’ve been having such a hard time with no kids home during the day because I should have Cooper here & the alone time just reminds me that he’s missing. It’s funny as a mom that sometimes what you think you want more than anything is just a little time to yourself, but when you finally get it you don’t really want it or just miss your kids anyways. I miss Clayton & Porter when they are gone. I miss my Cooper & always will until the day I die.